Blondes Jokes

Blondes Jokes

A business man got on an
A business man got on an elevato

One blonde was painting the ceiling
One blonde was painting the ceiling as the other painted the room Got a good grip on your brush? asked the blonde Sure said the other blonde Well hold on tight I`m taking away the ladde

A policeman pulled a blonde over
A policeman pulled a blonde over after he/she`d been driving the wrong way on a one-way street Cop: Do you know where you were going? Blonde: No but wherever it is it must be bad `cause all the people are leaving

A blonde walked into the pet
A blonde walked into the pet store and after looking up and down the aisles asked the sales clerk for help I d like a box of birdseed said the lady For which kind of bird? he asked helpfully Oh I dunno she replied Whichever will grow the fastest

A blonde walked into the pet
A blonde walked into the pet store and after looking up and down the aisles asked the sales clerk for help I d like a box of birdseed said the lady For which kind of bird? he asked helpfully Oh I dunno she replied Whichever will grow the fastest

A police officer stops a blonde
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license She replied in a huff I wish you guys would get your act together Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you

The executive was interviewing a young
The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked If you could have a conversation with someone living or dead who would it be? The blonde quickly responded The living one

Two blondes are walking down the
Two blondes are walking down the street One blonde finds a little mirror looks in it again and again Puzzled she says to her friend I just know I`ve seen this face before Give it to me says the other blonde She looks in the mirror and says Of course you silly It`s me

A window salesman telephoned his blonde
A window salesman telephoned his blonde customer Ms Brown our company replaced all your windows with triple-glazed models more than a year ago and we still haven`t received a single payment But the blonde protested You promised me they would pay for themselves in 12 months

The blonde college girl was supposed
The blonde college girl was supposed to write a short story in as few words as possible for her English class and the instructions were that it had to include Religion Sexuality and Mystery She was the only one who received an A+ This is what she wrote: Good God I m pregnant I wonder who did it

A girl was visiting her blonde
A girl was visiting her blonde friend and noticed she had acquired two new dogs and asked her what their names were The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex Her friend said Why did you give them names like that? The blonde responded What else would you name watch dogs?

A blonde asked a farmer Why
A blonde asked a farmer Why doesn t this cow have any horns? The farmer cocked his head for a moment then began in a patient tone Well cattle can do a lot of damage with horns Sometimes we keep them trimmed down Still there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns But the reason this cow doesn t have horns is because it s a horse

Judi went to a Dude Ranch
Judi went to a Dude Ranch on vacation The cowboy preparing the horses asked if she wanted a Western or English saddle Judi asked what the difference was Well said the cowboy one has a horn and the other doesn t Judi thought about it for a second and answered Just get the one without the horn I don t think we ll run into too much traffic out here

Blonde: I m on the road
Blonde: I m on the road a lot and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me Psychiatrist: Don t you have a cell phone? Blonde: They re too expensive so I did the next best thing: I put a mailbox in my car Psychiatrist: And do you receive any letters? Blonde: No but I figure it s because when I m driving around my zip code keeps changing

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway Glancing at the car he was astounded to see that the lady behind the wheel was knitting Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren the trooper cranked down his window turned on his bullhorn and yells PULL OVER NO she yelled back over the sound of the siren It s a SCARF

 

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